Do You Need A Resume Redo?

Earlier this week, my neighbor called to tell me she needed a favor.  I had just put the baby down for a nap and was really looking forward to cleaning my house.  Lame?  Maybe, but my house wasn’t going to clean itself.  Being the ever-thoughtful and generous neighbor, I asked what it was that she needed.

“I need help with my resume.”
Wow, I really wasn’t expecting that.  I was hoping she’d have wanted something more along the lines of a cup of sugar to be honest. “Okay, how can I help?”
“I tried to apply somewhere today, but they said they needed a resume and my computer is broken.”

I can be neighborly.  I told her I would be over when the princess awoke.  I also warned her that the baby now seemed to have the same head cold I had just gotten over.  This didn’t scare her off. An hour later, I arrived at her house with a lap top under my arm and a well-rested baby on my hip, ready to do my good deed for the day.  She led me to the kitchen where she had a pot of chicken soup stewing on the stove top.

“Have you eaten lunch?”
“Oh, I just ate.  It does smell delicious, though.”
“You have to have some.  It’s chicken soup.  It will be good for your cold.”

I smiled at her thoughtfulness.  Sure, it’s possible that she had planned to make chicken soup anyway that day, but the fact that she knew that we had colds and made chicken soup was too coincidental.  I guess now is a good time to give you some background on my neighbor.  She’s not from this country and she lost her husband a few years back to Cancer.  She’s a little older, quite petite, and often needs assistance with small things like yard work and such.  Since her husband passed, she has been trying to make herself as busy as possible, even working full-time though she’s at the age that most retire.  I don’t think she needs the full-time pay necessarily, but she’s very active, talkative, and prefers to be surrounded by people.  She’s always been kind to us and we try to help her out when we can.

I sat down at the kitchen table and turned on the lap top while she prepared a bowl of soup for me.  Being a generation older and not to mention one of the most opinionated people I’d ever met, she expressed her complete and utter shock that my baby wasn’t eating meat yet.  I know, I know.  30 years ago, it was unheard of to have an 8-month-old not eating anything but pureed fruits and veggies.  I smiled and nodded and insisted that my baby wasn’t hungry.

“Are you sure she can’t have a little chicken?  She looks hungry!”
“I’m sure.  Thank you.  We have food allergies in the family, so we have to be really careful.”
She waved at the air.  “She’s 8 months old!”
Knowing that I wouldn’t win any argument, I changed the subject.  ”So where is your resume?”
“Let me go find it.  I might have it in my car.”

While waiting for her to locate the missing resume, I asked where she wanted to apply.  She told me the store and it happens to be a national chain.  Great!  I can help her apply online and then get on with my cleaning fest.  I began the application process while she tried to locate her resume.  After several minutes (and me having filled out all of the basic information for her on the company’s website), she finally produced a piece of paper with her past jobs written on it.  It had been folded so many times that there were holes in the perforations and there were multiple colors of ink.  You could tell that she had used this same piece of paper to update each time she had a new job, instead of starting over.  Yes, this woman was from out of the country, but how could she have lived here for several decades without anyone ever helping her to construct an actual resume?

I decided I couldn’t let this woman live another day without a proper resume!  I also decided I should learn how to make homemade soup.  This stuff was the bomb!

This made me think.  I wonder how many other people are walking around with terrible resumes.  You don’t have to tattle on yourself.  Feel free to peruse through my list of resume must-haves to make sure your’s is up to snuff.

A Proper Introduction

At a lot of companies, the management will never get to see what you even look like before you receive a first interview.  Unfortunately, you might not even get that far if your resume screams “please don’t hire me!”  In big companies, there are Human Resources departments who will weed through hundreds of resumes for one open position.  If your resume is ridiculous at first glance, you won’t even get a second glance.  Remember that scene from Legally Blonde when she hands a prospective employer a pink, lightly perfumed resume?  If you’re not on the silver screen AND as adorable as Reese Witherspoon in a pink sweater set, I suggest you stick to basic white and leave the perfume at home.  Also, now isn’t the time to show off your creativity or dramatic flair.  Put your full name, address, and phone number on the top and keep it as simple as that.  If your full name is Johnathan Smith, don’t be cute and put Johnny or Smithy.

Bonus tip; don’t tell your future boss what your friends call you.  In fact, don’t ever tell anyone what your friends call you.  Tell people your name and let them pick their own nicknames for you.  This is one of those things that drives me crazy.  It always confuses me when people introduce themselves as one name, but then tell me with a wink what their friends call them.  Are we friends?  I just met you.  Now, I feel awkward calling you by either name that you’ve offered.  Thanks for at least making it multiple choice, but I’m still confused.  I shouldn’t have to think about what to call you.  Just shake my hand and tell me your name or your nickname…not both.

So Whatcha Whatcha Whatcha Want?

Your objective is what you would like to accomplish, so be specific.  Don’t just say that you want to obtain a position.  Everyone wants to obtain a position!  Say which position you would like to obtain!  It should say what job you would like and what you would like this job to do for you.  When I was job-searching, I had three different resumes, each tailored to which company I was applying.  This brings me to my next tip:

Tailor Your Experience

I did not say to lie.  I said to tailor.  The difference is if I’m applying for a managerial position, I’m going to make sure there are bullet points highlighting any and all experience I have as a manager.  If I’ve never held the position for which I’m applying, I would still have bullet points highlighting my experience pertinent to the job I want to land.  For example, a manager needs to be good at leading his/her staff, be self-disciplined, and have great organizational skills; therefore, I would ensure those three assets were highlighted.

Don’t Make Them Beg For It

I personally have a problem with putting the words “available upon request” anywhere on a resume.  You’re not playing poker.  You’re asking someone to trust and employ you.  If references are available and you would like to add them, put them on your resume.  If you aren’t sure you’d like any of your references to be called, don’t add them?  Honestly, most companies could care less about your references anyway, so leave it off unless you have little work experience.

Sweet Talk The Robot

At many large companies today, resumes are scanned electronically before you even have the chance to be turned down by HR.  The computers are scanning for certain keywords within a resume to ensure a candidate’s placement.  If the job you’re applying for requires using a computer in any way, shape, or form, be sure to list the softwares/technologies which will be a part of the job.

Bonus tip:  Even if you have little experience with a certain software, add it to the resume if you think your prospective job would utilize it.  Just don’t make it sound like you’re an expert if you’re not!

Talk Up Your Degree, Not Your Glee

Unless you’re a teenager applying for your first job, you probably shouldn’t mention that you were the head of your glee club in high school.  Oh wait, you were the editor of the newspaper in high school, too?  No one cares.  Leave it to your mom to brag about what an awesome teenager you were.  Do mention a high college GPA if applicable and even which classes you rocked, but leave band camp and your time as a wrestling cheerleader off of your resume.

Anyone else have any useful resume tips?  I know some of my friends are managers, so I’m hoping to see some good stories.

• Tweet
• Pin It