My Dentist The Pimp
Posted by michelle on Apr 10, 2012 in Saving Money | 53 comments
A few weeks ago, I went in to my dentist’s office for my bi-annual cleaning. I know I’m completely weird, but I actually enjoy going to the dentist. I guess I’ve always had a pretty good head of teeth to feel this way, but I didn’t need any orthodontic care as a teen, I didn’t have a lot of cavities or necessary procedures (except for one naughty tooth that kept messing up my clean streak), and I like the feeling of a clean mouth. To me, it feels great to get my teeth cleaned and I always enjoyed the part where the dentist comes in at the end and says that “everything looks great!”
But then, my dentist became a pimp. That’s my theory anyway. You see, after my cleaning this week, he came in and told me that I had a small cavity that would need to be filled. To someone that’s had many, this might not be a big deal. To me, though, this wasn’t something I appreciated him glazing over with the same verve I would assign to telling the bag boy that I prefer paper.
“Yes, briefly.” I had asked a couple years prior about some trouble-maker teeth of mine, but decided against them for multiple reasons. One being my vanity. Hey, I didn’t want to ruin the last few cute years I had left in me by transforming into a metal mouth. The second being my financial state. Shit’s expensive.
Annoyed, I approached the receptionist, a petite woman with a southern accent and….braces. BRACES!? She needs braces? She’s like 50. I wonder if my dentist is just telling people they need procedures like braces and fillings to keep the money coming in. That card in my pocket? The one my dentist just handed me is probably a “friend with benefits.” Ew, no. Not those kind of benefits. These friends “hook up” with referrals, and the more naive the referral, the better. Oh my God, my dentist is a pimp! Actually, if he’s a pimp, that makes me a….no, my dentist is just a money-grubbing liar. Yea yea, a few of my teeth are now slightly out of alignment when they used to be straight, but isn’t there any way he can just give me a retainer or something else equally geeky but far less inconvenient and costly? I need a new dentist now. I don’t like this guy OR trust him. Why am I here again?
The receptionist was waiting for a response. Apparently, I was making an appointment for a filling. ”Uhh…I’ll have to call you. I’m going to be very busy the next several weeks.” This wasn’t a lie. I plan on being very busy. Searching for a new dentist can be very time-consuming, you know.
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You’re freaking hilarious, Michelle. “If he’s a pimp, that makes me a…no.” lol
I do get really annoyed when people try to up-sell. I wish I could be educated and knowledgeable about all things so I’d know when people were just trying to sell me something.
It’s really important to have people you trust and not get taken advantage of. Good luck dentist shopping!
Exactly, Jason. It’s possible that I do just have a tiny cavity…and need braces
…but I don’t really like this guy. I’d rather just get a new dentist and start over. Jeff doesn’t like him either, so it’s time!
I love going to the dentist. I don’t love the procedure but afterward, it feels great!
Lots of dentists are like that. It’s too bad. Good luck finding another, more trustworthy dentist!
Ahh, I’m not alone. That freshly-cleaned feeling is the best!
Haha you kill me! I need to find a new dentist. Mine retired. Can’t seem to find a good one around here!
There are a lot around here, but this one was the closest. That’s the only reason we picked him! I think I can drive a few more minutes to go to someone that isn’t such a jerk.
Excellent story! I think my dentist tells me I need at least one small filing every time I go in, that said, I’ve never had any kind of tooth pain so I don’t mind, especially with 80% insurance coverage.
Good luck on the dentist hunt!
Oh, I wish we had that good of coverage! Ours pays 40%, and NOTHING on orthodontic care if you’re not a kid
I’ve been finding every doctor I see lately is all about the money. I think up here in Canada it may be even worse because the doctors earn a lower salary. So they try to make up for it with referrals for various tests and medications. It really makes it difficult to trust them, which is unfortunate since they’re supposed to be there to help people.
I can see why you have a hard time trusting them, Jeremy!
Oh, you made me laugh out loud
Good luck finding a new dentist!
Thanks, Mackenzie! Glad you got a giggle out of my silliness this morning
It seems rather strange to me that your dentist would try to sell you braces (especially at your age). For years, you’ve had great results after each recent dental visit, and now all of a sudden he’s recommending you for braces.
Generally, braces are highly recommended when there’s an alignment problem that serious enough to cause immediate tooth loss. That doesn’t sound like the case here. He clearly wanted to make more money off of you, and that’s not good business practice. Same on that PIMP!
I don’t think I’m about to lose any teeth, but I do have a tooth that’s pushing out and I keep forgetting about it and biting my lip accidentally. Can’t they just shove it back into place?
I love love LOVE my dentist. But he’s in creve coeur so I guess that isn’t as convenient for you. Anyway, his name is Gregory Palozola, 314-989-1999. His kids are older now, they’re about my age or a little older. But he takes most insurance plans, he’s honest, he’s a great dentist and he’s punctual and runs a good business. So yeah, yay!
Thanks, Carol! I don’t mind driving a little bit further if it means I will receive good care from an honest dentist.
It’s sad that our healthcare system has come to this. I don’t trust dentists. Never will. “I swear there’s a cavity but I can’t show you.”
Do you not go to one at all then, John? You’re right…it’s sad! I’m thinking about rigging my own braces. Thoughts?
I understand what you’ve been through with your dentist. He sounds like he is making up issues with your teeth just to make money. So many dentists do that. I went to a new dentist several years ago for an emergency. A small part of a filling cracked off. After fixing that he suggested I do the full exam and x-rays on my next visit, so I did. Then he had his account manager print off a list of my issues with dollar amounts. I knew the bill was going to be big. I could just tell by the dollar signs I saw in his eyes when he looked at me. Yup! He said I had 5 cavities and also needed some expensive device to wear at night so that I didn’t grind my teeth. I left like you did. Late last year I found a new dentist and did the whole xray thing again. Guess what? No cavities. I almost fell out of the chair. I was happy and angry all at the same time.
I’m happy and angry for you as well! What a jerk for lying to you! At least he didn’t get your money.
ICK. I got a Living Social deal for a teeth cleaning and a whitening and x-rays and whatnot for something like $125, which I thought was a good deal (since I don’t have dental insurance and hadn’t been forever). They told me I had cavities too, and I just listened. Then I realized my error, because it was something similar to that. And I haven’t been back.
Well, at least you haven’t been back. I do have dental insurance, but it’s a catch 22, because now I feel like I can’t go somewhere else for several months since they only pay bi-annually. I’m going to a new dentist my girlfriend referred me to in couple weeks for a consult about that mysterious cavity…and maybe he will enlighten me about the need for braces as well.
That’s so wrong. So incredibly wrong. I feel like health care professionals shouldn’t be allowed to do this. It’s your body and they should objectively weigh out the pros and cons of either getting a procedure done or not. It reminds me of when the OB tries to push a certain type of birth control on you.
The hippocratic oath! Yeah, they should…but how many do? Very disturbing indeed.
Great story! I’m one of those people who hate going to the dentist, especially because I usually end up having a lot of cavities, which makes it even more important to find one I trust. Good luck on your quest for a non-pimping dentist!
Thanks, YPF! I will update everyone after I go to a different dentist.
Gosh I need to find out what birth control I can make more money at from femmefrugality…
When seeing any professional, trust is key. If I feel like I’ve lost it from my patients, I ask them to go elsewhere. There is no way to help someone heal that doesn’t trust your advice.
I hope I don’t find “My Gyno Is A Pimp!” here soon…
Oh, you won’t. My gyno is kind of a hottie, though….so that’s awkward enough.
My gyno is a hottie too! Seriously, though, I love him, he’s no pimp.
I’m not sure what birth control methods doctors can make more money on but I’m pretty sure one of the reasons I had to switch doctors was because my old one wouldn’t switch my mirena because it cost too much.
The birth control methods you see on the door of the exam room or the one that’s got a cute, interactive display on thee prep table, I’m guessing. It is an educated guess, though, as I’ve worked in doctor’s offices and used to love when the reps came in with their spiff contests, free pens, posters and magazines to freshen up our exam rooms. It’s a love/hate relationship between the docs and the glorified, overpaid, and often gorgeous, sales people.
You can’t go anywhere these days without being upsold. I went to a dentist a while back who wouldn’t clean my teeth unless I agreed to do a deep root cleaning. When I declined the deep root cleaning he said, well I can’t clean your teeth. He then left the room.
James, that’s crazy! Did you end up going elsewhere?
I’ve had a dentist that I’ve been going to for a good many ears. Even so, I consider all doctors (dentists included) as my health consultants. The ultimate decision is mine, and if I don’t understand something, I make them give me more information or find it myself so that I can make an informed decision. I think that going with your gut there was a good idea. Sometimes you just need to make clear your expectations. “I’m here to get my teeth cleaned and cavities taken care of.” I’ll wait until next time on that one, or take care of it now. Whatever, but know what you’re there for. Don’t let them bother you. They’re a mouth mechanic. Treat them as such and you’ll be better off.
Mouth mechanic….I like that. I do respect doctors, so it saddened me when I lost that trust.
Michelle, you are an awesome and very creative writer. And you are absolutely hilarious!!
As usual….making me smile and blush with your sweet compliments, Shilpan!
I would suggest you to get another opinion Michelle. Most of the times people feel that their Dentist is robbing them. May be that’s because people give less importance to dental problems as compared to other ailments (until its a toothache)
Very true, Karunesh. If my teeth were bothering me, it would be a totally different post!
My finance is in dental school right now and unfortunately he has classmates that seem to care more about making a fat profit than providing actual care. Good luck on finding a new dentist
That’s very sad indeed! Gosh….corrupt right off the bat, huh?
Oh wow, it looks like a lot of people have dentists pushing the upsell. I haven’t been in a while, but it looks like I’ll have to be careful of this. Luckily I have no problem saying no, or pretending to be very “busy” as the case may be
I’m surprised by how many people are identifying with this as well, Kari.
You may think I’m joking when I tell you that he’s probably bought a new car or a bigger house. It was the same way in the financial advising business. ….makes you sick to your stomach.
My dentists does xrays every time. I know and he knows that my mouth hasn’t moved in six months. We also both know that insurance will pay for it every six months, so we do it.
Cha-flippin-ching!
I got x-rays too last time, but I just thought it was because I was pregnant last time. Wait….no, I wasn’t pregnant then either. Yea, I think I get them every time, too! What a pimp….
Yeah, I’m shopping for a new dentist myself. Every time I walk into her office I prepare like I’m responding to a telemarketer who managed to dupe me into answering the phone… without fail, she tries to hit me up for something that costs $500 out of pocket at every appointment.
Very annoying. I get that they’re running a business but they still owe duties to you as their patient… this gets me going quite a bit as you can probably tell…
Geez…I thought dentists made good enough money that they shouldn’t need to hustle!
Yeah, it sounds like you need a second opinion, at the very least, and at the most, a new dentist.
Sometimes I think that my dentist comes up with stuff when her sales are low. I remember once going in for a cleaning, and her commenting that my crown needed to be replaced, even though it didn’t feel remotely loose or look like it needed replacing. I put off going to the dentist for 2 years after that (stupid, I know) and when I did go, she took care of 2 cavities and nary a word was mentioned about my still-stable crown.
Wow, I go every 6 months… 2 years is a long time!
Friends with benefits — TOO FUNNY! My wife is a dental assistant. I’ll have to ask her how this referral business works. This is one of the funniest posts I’ve read in a long time. Thanks for the laugh!
Ooh Zack, you better come back and tell us what shee says!
She says the dentists are usually buddies from school or someone they’ve met over the years and they refer folks to each other all of the time. They are just helping each other out for the most part.
Great title! As if dentists didn’t make enough of the insurance, they have sell dubious products on top. I used to (briefly) to to one that smiled with the greasy way of a car salesman, with a mouthful of perfectly aligned white choppers, every time he pushed (pimped) for braces or teeth whitening.
Hilarious! This just makes me uncomfortable too, I would be so quick as to switch dentist!
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